You know how sometimes you put something down as a placeholder and tell yourself you’ll be back later? Monday’s post was exactly that. And all of a sudden, at 11:30 Monday night, I remembered that I had scheduled it to post automatically. I frantically restarted my computer (it’s been kind of slow, so I turn it off more often now) to see what unedited nonsense I had posted.
And actually, I didn’t hate it.
All my high school english teachers are probably breaking out in rashes at the sight of me not following up on a quotation (did they write “FU!!!!!” on your essays too?), but I actually think it was simple enough. And I don’t think that particular quotation really needed my conclusions at all.
Because sometimes, don’t you just get tired of hearing people talk?
This week especially, I just am having trouble maintaining boundaries in human interactions. I can’t quite keep other people’s stuff from getting on me. So I just want to walk around in a bubble of Things Kathryn Likes where no one else can get in.
Or, even more ideally, I’d love to not leave my house at all and not have to answer phone, email, or text.
Alas, that’s not in the cards for me this week.
I wish I had a coping mechanism that sounds less… wishy-washy, because all the feelings people are experiencing (and posting) this week is one of the things I’m having trouble with, but the best coping mechanism I can come up with is to remember that I don’t need to fix. With some people, I get lucky and don’t even need to respond. I can just stand there. And with every person, I can take whatever stuff they emanate and just act like a lightning rod, bringing it back to the Earth for recycling.
All that said, I’ll be at an airport all day Wednesday, and I am notorious for having a “Talk to Me” face, despite the huge earphones I wear. So I anticipate more human interaction, and maybe I’ll even enjoy it.